It Finally Happened!

It finally happened—life as I have known it is now over. My youngest son, Jeremy, just got his driver’s license. It seems like yesterday I brought home this bouncing, bubbly bundle of boy. Where did the time go? How did we move from diapers to driving in a blink of an eye? Wasn’t it yesterday I was running down the sidewalk holding the seat of a bicycle with the training wheels recently removed? Those were the easy days. But now, it finally happened—a new chapter in our lives has begun.

It was a fun journey—standing in line at the Registry, making the return trip because they don’t give permit tests after a certain time. Why would I rather have root canal work than going to the RMV? And if you think that was bad, try riding in the passenger seat more scared than a soldier in Iraq. I’ve heard words come out of my mouth that I never thought I’d say: “The stop sign is not a suggestion; you eventually have to get off the rotary; no, you can’t see how fast this car will go!”

Of course we had to log our forty hours of supervised driving with Dad while gas was almost $4.00 per gallon! The effet to my physical and emotional well-being was certainly more costly. And then there was that rule that worked so well when the boys were little—whoever is driving controls the music playing. Do you know how “relaxing” it is to listen to heavy metal while teaching a teenager to drive? (Believe it or not, I’m actually beginning to enjoy metal music!) I also now know how some of those skid marks get on the highway barriers. I have also learned to scream one word commands very fast and very loudly: “Stop!” “Go!” “Brake!” “Truck!” “Incoming!”

Then came the fateful day when Jeremy was finally ready for his road test. Of course, rather than going with his “patient” father, he wanted to go with his driver education teacher (of course for a not-so-modest fee). Finally, I get the text message, “I got it!” and I am relieved (hoping it wasn’t sent while he was driving).

That reminds me, there are things I’m saying to my son that I never heard when I started driving in 1972: “No cell phone use or text messaging while driving. No playing with the iPod controls, keep your hands on the wheel, especially when your girlfriend is in the car.” Okay, not everything I said is exclusive to the twenty-first century.

I am also hearing things from Jeremy I’ve never heard before—and this started the day after the license was in hand: “When are you going to get me a car, you got Tim (the older brother) a car?” Dad replies quietly, “I really didn’t get Tim a car, I got myself a sports car and gave him my old car.”

“Well that’s not fair Dad, you have to get me a car!”

“Congratulations—you’ve learned your first adult lesson—life isn’t fair.”

Now I must admit, I’m exaggerating a bit (for the noble purpose of humor). Jeremy is actually a great driver; he’s a natural behind the wheel. And don’t tell him (or his mother), I’m looking for a car for him because although life isn’t fair, good old Dad loves having his driveway look like a used car lot. Of course there will be expectations in addition to the cell phones and iPod usage rules. Drinking and driving are never acceptable for novice or experienced drivers. Seeing how fast the car goes on 495 (or any other route number or road) is not only illegal, but also very foolish and deadly. And the most important rule: enjoy driving safely before the gas prices go back up again. One more expectation—get a job!